April: Week 3 Check-In

APRIL 2013 GOALS

Month is currently 70% over.
Overall: 79% complete.

CAREER - 105% Complete

Hit target number of monthly illustrations. - 120% complete.
Number illustrations completed - 83% complete.

Make target income for the month. - 148% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.
Finish February's illustration. - 75% complete.
Some notes: When I took a week off at the beginning of the month, I fully expected to see my target income hang around 75%.  Caricature gigs have definitely helped with that.  That being said, it is after prom season and my sleep schedule is a little messed up from it.

FINANCIAL - 85% Complete

Make target income for the month. - 100% complete.

Keep budget. - 70% complete.
Some notes: Something I'd like to do next month is check into switching insurance companies, or at least downgrading our car insurance.  Aaron and I have always kept full coverage on our cars which, with renter's insurance, usually comes up to almost 2k a year.  Considering that we own a '99 and an '01, there's little reason for that.  Unfortunately, it saved our hides in January of 2012 when that kid spun out and hit our car.  He didn't have enough insurance to cover and we were the only ones in the lot that had full coverage, so we just went through our insurance to get it fixed.  That being said, I have to remember that that was a freak accident.  Of course, that's what insurance is supposed to cover.  So tied.  

HEALTH - 48% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 70% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 25% complete.
Dentist appointment. - 0% complete.
Some notes: I keep exercising and dieting but the weight just isn't coming off.  I'm sure it has something to do with my thyroid.  I've felt unnaturally bloated all month.  I feel like it's time to do a cleanse and flush the water weight off.  Ugh.  It also doesn't help that the girls have all pretty much permanently cancelled.  I'm the only one with motivation anymore and I like being social when I exercise.  It sucks.  On the bright side, I have a solution.  I signed up for not one but two weekly exercise courses between May and June.  If I'm so tired of being by myself, it's time to revert back to what I did to lose my first 15 pounds.  And besides, by June, I should be able to see an endocrinologist.  That might help as well.

God dammit Aaron, a list of dentists would be nice.  I'm moving that goal to May since I can't seem to get it this month.

HOME - 75% Complete

Organize the den closet. - 100% complete.
Organize the entrance closet. - 50% complete.
Some notes: So I worked on the entrance closet for five minutes and got it half way clean.  Easy peasy.

KNOWLEDGE - 71% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 70% complete.

Continue taking supplements. - 70% complete.

Continue daily mental exercises. - 70% complete.

Read one book. - 75% complete.
Some notes: Nothing to report.

PERSONAL - 66% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 70% complete.

Meditate three times in April. - 66% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 25% complete.

Adhere to my planner schedule. - 70% complete.

RELATIONSHIP - 100% Complete

Do one date night. - 100% complete.
Some notes: Nothing new here either.

SPIRITUAL - 83% Complete

Meditate three times in April. - 66% complete.
Volunteer for the local pet shelter once this month. - 100% complete.
Some notes: And nothing here.

Times are Changing plus Day 7!

Before I get into my post, I wanted to share with you our huge cleaning success this past week.  Look at that left-side catastrophe that was our den closet.  It was a terrifying wreck. Almost everything after my zombie-themed birthday party got crammed in there last year along with all our Renfest gear.  There's a torn up laundry basket filled with nothing of value on the top shelf.  I can even see a white trash bag of clothes so messed up or torn up I'd be embarrassed to donate them.  What a wreck!

Fortunately, because it was such a mess, it took me and my husband a whole two hours to clean it out total.  A lot of it went straight to the trash.  Surprisingly, under the pile was a bunch of old computer stuff that my husband had to sort.  Getting him motivated to do it was honestly what took the longest.  We ended up one with case and one box out of all of that stuff.

What was left after our clean-out was a half-empty closet that could honestly be combined with the office closet.  My goal, by the end of September, is to empty out so much of our stuff that moving is a one-day job and not a one-week job.  I also want to get empty enough by May that moving my best friend and her boyfriend in will be a piece of cake, not a cram-fest.

Which leads me to my next topic: times are changing.  My best friend, Charli, confirmed that she will be moving down by the end of May.  When we were in high school, all we ever talked about was rooming at SCAD together.  Of course, neither of us went to SCAD, and thank goodness too - she already has enough student loans and I would have actually had them on top of Aaron's.  Yikes!

Aaron and I have had our share of bad roommate experiences.  So has Charli and Eric.  After everything we've been through, Charli might be the only person in the universe I would attempt to live with.  I won't lie: I'm terrified.  I don't want to ruin our friendship.  But with some few base laws that we all have to abide by (read: roommate agreement), and some friendship elbow grease, I think it'll really work.  So far, every fear I have had about it has simply panned out, which I think is a good sign.

The other day we were talking and Charli mentioned something about how much I've changed.  So much so, she felt "out of the loop."  Things really are changing.  For one, the camping trip made me realize that I want to camp way more often.  Once a month would be great.  And I really want to go on a more extended trip involving a few days.  I never realized how much I would enjoy it.  So there's that.

Two, I've decided to make a major life decision and go pescetarian (also known as a pesci-vegetarian).  It sounds like a huge, random leap but it's actually been a long time coming.  I spent a few weeks gently avoiding all meat and found it to be relatively easy.  I then addressed my desire to my husband, who supports me whole-heartedly.  After this week, I will no longer be as lax about it was I was in the past month or so and will start stating that I'm a pescetarian when offered non-pescetarian food.

So why pescetarian?  A variety of reasons, actually.  It's actually cheaper to be a pescetarian or vegetarian than it is to be an omnivore.  There's a reason many third-world country citizens are vegetarian and not by choice.  Meat is actually downright expensive.  Also, a vegetarian or pescetarian diet tends to be fiber-rich and lower in fat.  Since I've been having trouble losing weight, a pescetarian diet could give me the boost I need to drop some more pounds.

Then there's all the standard reasons.  Everyone knows my stance on animal rights and cruelty.  How can I be against animal cruelty when I eat animals who haven't had a fair life?  I don't think for one minute that my resignation of eating beef, pork or poultry will change the industries.  It's simply a preference I have.  On top of it, abstaining from eating meat reduces my personal carbon footprint and personal water consumption.  Again, I'm not someone who thinks that my decision has a huge impact.  I'm aware of how small it is.  But small as it may be, it's there.  That's what matters to me.

But why pescetarianism instead of vegetarianism?  The answer's simple: I'm moderately carb-intolerant thanks to my thyroid.  While I still think cutting higher-fat meats out of my system will help me lose weight, I'm aware of the protein I need to survive.  Therefore, I'm willing to include fish and shellfish out of my concern for my personal health.  That also makes it easier on my relatives, who may not understand what seems like a sudden change.

If I could go vegan, I would.  I can't afford to at this point in my life.  I would like to avoid more animal products in the future, beyond just what I eat.  It's a goal for much later.

And finally, my Day 7 Inspirational Challenge from Monday:

Inspirational Challenge

Day 7: Monday, April 15th

Wake up 30 minutes early for...

Breakfast Questions

What is my greatest challenge in my life right now?
Honestly, I'm a harsh critic of everyone when I'm completely by myself.  I need to stop judging others by the same standard I judge myself.  Everyone's fighting their own battle and trying their best.

Who do I love in my life?
My husband helps me through everything.  He is my psychiatrist, my wellness coach, my support group, my chef and my love all in one.  I don't know how I got so lucky.

What am I proud of in my life?
My three rescues who continue to amaze me every day.
My ability to achieve my dream job and maintain it without having a "day" job.
My dedication to my health.  Even if I messed up a bit last month, I've been routinely successful.

What brings me happiness in my life?

My friends.  They're an amazing group of girls.  I have so much in common with them and they have truly changed my life.  And my best friend, who has always been there for me, always pushing me to be the best version of myself possible.

What am I grateful for in my life?

My health.  Despite being hypothyroid, which is a common affliction and manageable with medication, I am otherwise healthy and relatively fit.

One Random Act of Kindness

I offered my condolences about the Boston Marathon explosions on Monday via Facebook to spread the word.  It's not much, I know, but it's something.

Also, while it's not really random, I did offer to pay for my religious group's get-together next Tuesday on Monday.

Donate One Item

Final donation list: Bag of 20+ like-new cat and dog toys, pirate shirt (never used), old pageboy hat, art box, braided leather belt, two fake machetes, Webster Dictionary, Hawaii keychain, two bracelets, two banana clips and one incense burner.
There's actually a lot more than this, but these are the items I decided to pull specifically for this challenge.

Read for 30 Minutes

Did this!

20-30 Minutes of Exercise

Walked the dog for about 20 minutes.  You know, before it started raining again...

End of the Day Questions

How did today go?
It went well!

What were your strengths?
I've been having a long streak of successful portion control this week.  Seems I'm back on my diet full-force!

What were your weaknesses?
Trying to work has been a struggle.  I'm experiencing severe burnout from work.  Also, the two weeks almost-straight of clouds have not helped one bit.

What went well?
Since we finished cleaning the closet today, donating was again the easiest task.

What are you grateful for?
My husband and pets, who make life worth living.

What could you do different next time?
When I wake up, I need to stay up, no matter how tired the clouds make me.  I think it's impeding any desire I have to work.

Anything else?
Nope!

April: Week 2 Check-In plus Inspirational Challenge days 4, 5 and 6.

APRIL 2013 GOALS

Month is currently 50% over.
Overall: 55% complete.

CAREER - 67% Complete

Hit target number of monthly illustrations. - 58% complete.
Number illustrations completed - 30% complete.

Make target income for the month. - 73% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.
Finish February's illustration. - 75% complete.
Some notes: I mentioned, at some point, that I did some spiritual work about a week ago.  That involved a lot of drawing, so I'm counting that as my drawing for myself.  Also, while it looks like I'm a little off on my number of illustrations completed, I'm actually right on schedule.  Because I took a week off, my numbers related to my work this month might be a little wonky.

FINANCIAL - 62% Complete

Make target income for the month. - 73% complete.

Keep budget. - 50% complete.
Some notes: Nothing really to report here.

HEALTH - 20% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 50% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 10% complete.
Dentist appointment. - 0% complete.
Some notes: So I'm technically behind here.  Thing is, trying to get my husband to give me a list of available dentists in the area has been a pain.  I've asked for it for two weeks now and nothing.  The website isn't helpful.  I'm really just going to have to drive to his work and get a list.  Bah.  Also, weighing myself this week isn't really possible for girl reasons, so I'm going with a weight I saw on a spontaneous weigh I did last Thursday.  That was 164.6.  I should be 164 by now, but I'm not sure if I got there.  Despite everything, I signed up for some exercise classes next month, so if I don't lose all the weight, I'm sure to lose more then.
Side note: Dentist check list - Find a dentist's office, set the appointment and go.

HOME - 38% Complete

Organize the den closet. - 75% complete.
Organize the entrance closet. - 0% complete.
Some notes: Trying to get Aaron to work on the den closet is like pulling teeth.  I thought the closet was mostly my stuff - turns out, it's mostly his.  I already have my stuff cleaned out.  He was supposed to finish his half before we went camping this weekend, but it didn't happen.  I swear, men.  Nothing motivates them.

KNOWLEDGE - 41% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 50% complete.

Continue taking supplements. - 50% complete.

Continue daily mental exercises. - 50% complete.

Read one book. - 15% complete.
Some notes: I finally chose a book for this month.  Only took me half the month to do so.  Now the trick will be reading it in time.

PERSONAL - 47% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 50% complete.

Meditate three times in April. - 33% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 0% complete.

Adhere to my planner schedule. - 50% complete.

RELATIONSHIP - 100% Complete

Do one date night. - 100% complete.
Some notes: I will give Aaron this: he completely orchestrated our camping trip (probably why he slacked on everything else) and it was amazing.  We even took Artie with us and he did so well!  I'm so proud of my dog.  We went to Cross Timbers State Park near Toronto, KS.  We set up by about 5 pm Saturday and stayed until noon the next day - and the only reason we left so early was because the wind was literally tearing up the tent.  Woo, windstorm.  It was an amazing experience though, and I can't wait to do it again!

SPIRITUAL - 67% Complete

Meditate three times in April. - 33% complete.
Volunteer for the local pet shelter once this month. - 100% complete.
Some notes: I meditated once shortly before we left.  I also volunteered on the sixth.  I'm not volunteering this upcoming Saturday because I have a drawing gig at an after prom that night and need to sleep in to be awake for it.  Turns out, I'll also have to cancel for May 4th's date because Aaron's sister is graduating college in Indiana.  I really hate cancelling since I said I'd be available, but it's not like his sister is going to graduate again.

-----

Inspirational Challenge

Days 3, 4 and 5: April 12th - 14th

Note: I was unable to do this every day for Friday, Saturday and Sunday because I went camping!  Also, pictures for EVERYTHING!

Wake up 30 minutes early for...

Breakfast Questions

What is my greatest challenge in my life right now?

I overthink everything and worry entirely too much.  For example, we treated Artie for ticks and I sprayed him down with repellent. When we got home, we immediately bathed him and found two dead ticks attached to his front left paw, which we removed.  Now it's probably fine.  They were female Lone Star ticks, which means they're highly unlikely to carry Lyme disease.  Since we removed them, and they were dead anyway, he won't have tick paralysis.  It doesn't change the fact that I'm concerned about him.  He's tired - honestly from the trip, I'm sure - but it worries me.  He slept all night last night and is still drowsy and sleeping today.  I'm going to give it a few days.  I want to see him eat and drink on his own and be more perky.  If he isn't by Thursday or Friday, I'm taking him to the vet.  But he's honestly probably fine and I'm sure I'm just panicking about nothing.

Who do I love in my life?

My husband, who planned, reserved and collected everything we needed for the camping trip, and our date weekend, all by himself.  It was so much fun!
My dog, who went camping with us like a champ!  He snuggled with us all night, snored in my ear, licked me when the sun came up, ran around the campsite like a mad dog and had so much fun.
And my cat, Zeus, who was patiently waiting for us in the window when we got home.  When I approached the window, he "head booped" me through the window meowing and wouldn't let me out of his sight.  Most cats (like Hermes) hold grudges when you leave.  Zeus just wanted to love me.

What am I proud of in my life?

The amazing dog I raised.  When we got there, we needed to set up the tent.  I had no where to put the leash for Artie, so I let him off the leash.  We ended up not putting him back on the leash unless we left our camping area.  He was perfect!   He never tried to stray, staying with us the whole time.  He refused to leave our sides, even for a squirrel, and actually got really protective of us at night.  My baby boy is perfect.

What brings me happiness in my life?

Disconnecting from the world really brought me peace and happiness.  Also, for once, I took a real weekend.  Usually, I still respond to commissioners over the weekend, and I often work in attempt to "get a bit ahead" for the next week.  Being without electricity or signal on my phone, I couldn't connect.  And it was an amazing feeling.

What am I grateful for in my life?

The way everything seems to work out in life.  No matter how upset I get, or how much I fight the universe, it seems to go exactly the way I need it to - whether I see it that way or not.

One Random Act of Kindness

I genuinely complimented six of my friends on their favorite social network.  I did it publicly, not for the gratitude or any kind of attention, but so that others would know just how amazing they are.

Donate One Item

Technically, because of the funk I was in, I didn't donate anything for Thursday either, so I'm making up for that.  Yesterday, I collected a couple bracelets I didn't want, a few banana clips, a Hawaii key chain (how did I end up with that anyway?), a braided belt, one dictionary and a large bag of toys Artie doesn't (or potentially never) played with.  There's also some cat toys in there.  At least 20 pieces in that bag.  Hopefully that makes up for it.

Read for 30 Minutes

Finally picked a book yesterday and did this!  I'm still really behind though.  I think I technically need to read for two hours or so to catch up.

20-30 Minutes of Exercise

Friday, Aaron and I went for a walk.  Saturday, we put up the tent (trust me, that's a good 30 minutes of exercise), and Sunday, we went on a hiking trail and took down the tent in a windstorm (even more than 30 minutes and a lot harder).  So I got my exercise over the weekend.

End of the Day Questions

How did today the weekend go?
It was absolutely amazing!

What were your strengths?
Turns out, I can problem solve on a dime.  Aaron's never put up that tent before, and I've never been camping, meaning I've never touched a tent in my life.  Turns out, I figured out how to put it up and helped Aaron get it together.  He said he wasn't sure we would have even slept in a tent that night had it not been for me.  I am a badass, or so I'd like to think.

What were your weaknesses?
I'm not very social.  When we first got there, we selected a campsite that was away from the few other campers in the park.  When we got back, there were a bunch of drunks in the campsite right next to us (our campsites were technically joined).  I was so irritated I nearly unloaded on them.  Turns out, the camp has a zero alcohol policy and they were removed within a few minutes of us being there.  We didn't even call it in.  Also made me feel a lot better about the park we chose.

What went well?
Again, Artie.  I couldn't have ever imagined him doing as well as he did.  That's my pup!

What are you grateful for?
My husband, who put together this amazing weekend all by himself.  He even nitpicked himself a bunch, which was kind of cute.  He was so afraid of it not going perfectly, but it completely did.

What could you do different next time?
Bring a lantern.  While it was fine not to have one, and we just went to bed when it got too dark to see, I wouldn't have minded having something for a bit of light.  Aaron forgot it and down talked himself so much about it.  It didn't ruin the camping experience - not one bit!  But we might want one next time.

Anything else?
Nope!

Inspirational Challenge Day 3/7

Inspirational Challenge

Day 3: Thursday, April 11th

Wake up 30 minutes early for...

Breakfast Questions

What is my greatest challenge in my life right now?
Got cancelled on for exercise night again tonight and for next week as well by one of the girls.  Once upon a time, there were exercise nights twice weekly, and at least two or three people would show up.  Now, there's just nothing.  I want to say, "That's okay, I understand that you're too tired after work to exercise," or  "It's alright that you have commissions. So do I, so I don't mind."  Truth is, I'm tired and I have commissions, but I still want to exercise.  And anyone who thinks my job isn't stressful or hard doesn't understand what it means to freelance.  It's about carving out time whether you feel like it or not.  I guess I should take my own advice and just exercise alone.  Sometimes I feel like I should just send out a mass message cancelling all exercise nights so I'm not constantly disappointed in people.

Who do I love in my life?
I'm not feeling particularly friendly to anyone right now, not going to lie.  Even my husband has been largely absent today, and when he has been available, he seems annoyed with me.  On the bright side, Artie knows exactly when I'm upset.  He curled up with me while I felt down earlier and has been attached to my side.  My baby boy.

What am I proud of in my life?
A couple nights ago, I started working on something spiritual for myself.  I've been meaning to work on it all year and haven't gotten around to it, so I'm pretty proud of finally starting on it.

What brings me happiness in my life?

Right at this moment, it's hard to think of anything that isn't a vice.  Like food.  Food makes me happy, but that's also partially why I'm overweight.  If I had to pick something healthy, I guess I'd have to say the sunlight, since we haven't gotten any of that for most of the week.  It's yet another dreary, cloudy and rainy day today.

What am I grateful for in my life?

My pets, particularly my dog today.  Dogs in particular are loyal, loving and forgiving.  I don't know what I'd do without mine.

One Random Act of Kindness

Can someone give me a random act of kindness today?  I could really use one.

-----

So above is as far as I got yesterday before I just gave up.  Same days just lack that spark I need to get moving.

Because I didn't complete this day, I'll be doing double-time today.  I'll also be adding an additional day onto my 7 Day Challenge this week.

Inspirational Challenge Day 2/7

Inspirational Challenge

Day 2: Wednesday, April 10th

Wake up 30 minutes early for...

Breakfast Questions

What is my greatest challenge in my life right now?
Patience.  I was cancelled on both Monday and Tuesday by two different girls for exercise night.  I spend a lot of time and effort trying to track down people to set up exercise dates only to get repeatedly blown off.  I sent out a message trying to rally some people up to take the same exercise course I took last year together, but no one can make it.  Some people I understand have other obligations, but others are just simply being lazy.  There's always an excuse.  I feel like the only person I know who cares about getting healthy.

Who do I love in my life?
My pets.  They never bail on me, always loyal.  In fact, Artie and Zeus are cuddled up at my feet together and Hermes is sleeping on my husband's office chair right behind me.  I don't know what I'd do without my fuzzy coworkers to keep me sane.

What am I proud of in my life?
The 15 pounds I lost last year during an exercise course and my total weight loss of 25 lbs since I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism.  Though it doesn't feel like it at times, I'm over halfway to my goal.  I tell myself that a lot when I feel like giving up.

What brings me happiness in my life?

Sleep.  Lots and lots of sleep.  It's been cloudy and rainy for the past several days, so waking up early has been difficult.  I've almost switched my schedule to going to bed at 5 in the morning and getting up at 1 in the afternoon.  I always wake up feeling well rested when I sleep like this, despite how much it disrupts my life.  I loves me some sleep.

What am I grateful for in my life?

The job I have that gives me both the money and the time to take the courses I need to take to achieve a healthier me.

One Random Act of Kindness

I offered to pay up front for a friend's exercise class if they could pay me back before the end of the six weeks.  I would have offered to just pay for it, but I don't really have a spare $40 laying around given our savings situation. That being said, if finances are an issue, hopefully that will remove the problem.

Donate One Item

Adding to my art box from yesterday are two fake machetes from my Zombie Birthday Bash last year.  They didn't get used during the party. Even if I decide to have another Halloween or zombie-themed party again, they can still be given away.

Read for 30 Minutes

Still unsure of what to read for this.

20-30 Minutes of Exercise

It rained all day, so I was unable to go on a walk.  I should have pulled out an exercise DVD, but I didn't.

End of the Day Questions

How did today go?
It went alright.

What were your strengths?
I actually had great self-control today!  I still have over 300 calories left and I'm currently feeling very full.  I've also been very healthy today with my food - a salad with tuna and lemon juice, a veggie burger, tomato soup, a protein and vitamin bar, egg whites, Greek yogurt.  I'm a boss at dieting when I put my mind to it!

What were your weaknesses?
Trying to work today has, again, been like pulling teeth.  I really want to work on something else specifically, but I know I need to work and it's distracting.  I also should have exercised today.  I really meant to, but the rain was so heavy and all I really want to do is go walking/jogging lately with the nice weather.

What went well?
Again, nabbing something to donate was a matter of reaching in the closet and pulling something out.  Super easy.

What are you grateful for?
My husband, who has spent most of the evening attempting to motivate me into some work.  I definitely need it.

What could you do different next time?
Exercise DVD.  I have 'em.  I should use 'em.

Anything else?
Nope!

Inspirational Challenge Day 1/7

Inspirational Challenge

Day 1: Tuesday, April 9th

Wake up 30 minutes early for...

Breakfast Questions

What is my greatest challenge in my life right now?
Self-control.  The minute I didn't lose weight last month, even though I knew exactly why, I fell out of my diet.  I didn't diet at all on my week off either.  I'm trying to get back on track, but yesterday, I ate a veggie burger even after I knew I had hit my calorie limit.  So, self-control.

Who do I love in my life?
My husband supports me regardless of what happens in life.  He is my rock.  When my exercise buddy for Monday cancelled, he stepped up and walked two miles with me yesterday.  I couldn't ask for more.
And my girls.  I spent the day with them on a friendship emergency yesterday.  We know how to laugh, we antagonize each other in the best way possible, we share absolutely (and I mean absolutely) everything, and we sang songs together the whole hour-long drive home.  Without them, I wouldn't be the person I am and I certainly wouldn't have made it through 2012.  They support me in the worst of times and I don't give them enough credit.

What am I proud of in my life?
My career.  I may not be working on major projects for companies or artwork that you'd see every day.  I may not be a household name, but that was never, ever my goal anyway.  Fame wasn't a necessity. I just wanted to make it - and I did.  I freelance full-time.  That's my job.  That's everything I do.  It's not a side-job or a hobby; I don't work a dull job to support my art.  My art is my support.  Not many can say that.

What brings me happiness in my life?

A lot of people and events do, but nothing makes me smile more than my pets.  When I woke up this morning, Zeus was curled up with his head on my pillow, Hermes was laying across my stomach and Artie was using my feet as his pillow.  All I have to do is look at Zeus and he comes running over like, purring and mewing.  Artie is so amazingly smart, my pride and joy and proof that good parenting makes great pets.  Someone just didn't know how to work with him, but look at him now!  And Hermes?  Despite all of his dickery, he's become amazingly loving and sweet.  And when they're all together, they're one big family.  How did I get so lucky?

What am I grateful for in my life?

The amazing house we're currently renting. My ability to practice my religion freely with my friends and lead a strong group of amazing, enabled and empowered women down the path.  The freedom (and maybe even lack there of) that my job gives me.  The fact that my body still moves, that I can still get down on and up off the floor with ease, and that, other than hypothyroidism, allergies and the occasional asthma, I am healthy.  And the fact that all of those previously mentioned are manageable - not life threatening and certainly not impeding as long as I'm on the right medication.

One Random Act of Kindness

I sent a (real, not digital) gift to a friend who really needed a pick-me-up.

Donate One Item

This is my art box from college.  It's been sitting empty for over two years in my closet.  Off it goes to a thrift store!

Read for 30 Minutes

I'm still really not sure what I'm going to read for this month.  I'm very indecisive.  Also, chances are, I'll have to wait for it to come in once I do decide, so this may not be a possibility this week.
Unless you count all the articles I read today.  Then I'm certain I read for more than 30 minutes.

20-30 Minutes of Exercise

I did have a picture for this, but my phone decided to corrupt it.
I went on a 25 minute walk with my husband and our dog this evening right before the rain.
I also had planned on exercising with Alex tonight, but she cancelled. :(

End of the Day Questions

How did today go?
Well, I think!

What were your strengths?
I was able to overcome being cancelled on again and work out anyway.  Even if it was just a two mile walk, it's something!

What were your weaknesses?
Self-control as usual.  So far, I'm about 50 calories over my limit, and I'm starving like crazy.  I'll probably end up going about 200 calories over.
I've also been very lazy today.  Trying to work has been like pulling teeth.  Still in vacation mode, I suppose.

What went well?
Nabbing something to donate was super easy since we're cleaning out a closet.

What are you grateful for?
My husband, who helps me with pretty much anything I ask for.

What could you do different next time?
Actually find some motivation.  I need it.  Also, space out my eating a little bit more.  Ugh I'm so hungry.

Anything else?
Not really!

Which 7 Day Challenge should I start tomorrow?

7 Day Challenges:

Summer Arms Challenge

Summer Butt Challenge

Summer Abs Challenge

Inspirational Challenge

Which 7 Day Challenge should I begin tomorrow?
	Summer Arms Challenge
	Summer Butt Challenge
	Summer Abs Challenge
	Inspirational Challenge
	Other (Please comment with a link to your suggestion!)
pollcode.com free polls

Getting back on top of things.

No check-in this week.  Why?  I've been on a much-needed vacation from absolutely everything.  Other than taking commissions for this upcoming week, sorting some paper work and some deep cleaning for the house, I really just stayed in and played games all week.  I got my hair dyed, went to Perkins and generally said screw it to my diet.  Even more so, the in-laws came over to help us clear some brush from the backyard today and I, for the first time ever, did not participate.

I have been one lazy slob.

But now, it's Monday, and that's officially over.  I can't say I feel 100% rested from the monotony that has been the 2013 catch-up year (that'd take at least another week... maybe two?), but I feel better.  Now I need to look towards the rest of the month.  Thanks to my fantastic week off, I have to do four weeks worth of work in about three.  Yikes!  I reorganized my marker calendar, stepped up my schedule planning and set up a calendar on my desktop in Sticky Notes.  I've got my week planned out and, if I can stay on top of everything, I'll be set.

The big thing about last month was that it was the first month I didn't hit my weight loss goal.  In fact, I actually gained a pound. Disappointing!  I weighed myself this morning and nothing has changed despite being off the diet (phew!).  That's at least a firm step in place.  To take steps forward, I need to be proactive.

Yesterday, I tagged some of the friends who used to work out with me on a regular basis to see if they wanted to set up regular exercise times again.  I actually ended up hearing from someone else entirely, Nic, who wanted to set up Wednesday jog days.  Alex also contacted me about Tuesday nights, so I should be heading her direction for Zumba then.

Natalie and I, as far as I know, are still meeting for Monday and Thursday night exercises.  Truth is, we haven't met in a while though.  I cancelled on her last Thursday for a showing and she cancelled last Monday for a hangover.  And, while I can't remember from before that, there has been a lot of cancelling going on.  To make matters even worse, I have a friendship emergency that will have me out of town tomorrow.  I expect to get back in tomorrow evening, so I'm hoping she'll be up for exercising then.

If I can keep all of that going, that's four light to moderate workouts every week.

On top of that, I got our local high school's community education packet.  In May of last year, I took an exercise course through the school district.  I lost 15 pounds and kept it off, but have struggled to lose any more than that since then.  I fully intended to take the course again in the fall, but the moved they location and I didn't want to drive all the way out there.  While they haven't moved it closer for the spring, I'm really tired of trying to do this by myself, so I fully intend to take it again.  I asked the group and Natalie showed interest.  I'm hoping we can get at least two days in for that each week.  That'll change up my schedule a bit for May and June, but it'll be worth it.

Finally, I'm looking into some week-long challenges for April to get me to my goal.  I haven't settled on anything yet, though I probably should since this is week one, but here are some challenges I've been interested in:

7 Day Challenges:
Summer Arms Challenge
Summer Butt Challenge
Summer Abs Challenge
Clean Eating Challenge
Salad Challenge
Inspirational Challenge

I'm not much for sitting around and doing nothing.  The only way to move forward is to get moving.  Hopefully, between the challenges, the new exercise nights and the classes in May, I'll get back on top of my weight loss goals.

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Edit: Take my poll below to help me decide which 7 Day Challenge I should start tomorrow!  I've excluded the clean eating and salad challenges because I've already grocery shopped for this week, but all the other ones are open.  OR, if you have a seven day challenge you want to suggest, choose "Other" and comment on this journal entry with a link!

Which 7 Day Challenge should I begin tomorrow?
	Summer Arms Challenge
	Summer Butt Challenge
	Summer Abs Challenge
	Inspirational Challenge
	Other (Please comment with a link to your suggestion!)
pollcode.com free polls

Official April Checklist

APRIL 2013 GOALS

Month is currently 13% over.

CAREER - 27% Complete

Hit target number of monthly illustrations. - 28% complete.
Number illustrations completed - 0% complete.

Make target income for the month. - 31% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 0% complete.
Finish February's illustration. - 75% complete.
Some notes: Surprise, surprise - I'm actually taking this week off!  I'm still running paperwork (taking commissions, filing notes, receiving payments, etc), but I'm not doing a lick of drawing until Monday.  Also, like last month, I have a few drawing events that will help boost my income.

FINANCIAL - 15% Complete

Make target income for the month. - 16% complete.

Keep budget. - 13% complete.
Some notes: Going by the new budget this month.  That will definitely help.

HEALTH - 0% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 13% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 0% complete.
Dentist appointment. - 0% complete.
Some notes: This week will involve finding a dentist's office.  Next week, I need to set the appointment.  I know I have a cavity (at least one) on the upper right side.  It's been four years since I've had my teeth cleaned last and, while I'm meticulous about my dental hygiene, I know those teeth cleanings are pertinent.  I also think that the tooth I'm having pain in actually lost a filling rather than me developing a cavity.  My two cents.  However, fillings involve needles and we all know how I am about needles, so a dental appointment will be full of fun.

HOME - 0% Complete

Organize the den closet. - 0% complete.
Organize the entrance closet. - 0% complete.
Some notes: Doubling up for impending move.  We're not planning to move until September at earliest, but we technically always on one month notice given that the house we're renting is for sale.   We moved up our move date because my best friend is attempting to move down.  If she succeeds, we'd like to move in together.

KNOWLEDGE - 10% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 13% complete.

Continue taking supplements. - 13% complete.

Continue daily mental exercises. - 13% complete.

Read one book. - 0% complete.
Some notes: I still need to choose a book for this month.  I'm open for suggestions!

PERSONAL - 5% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 13% complete.

Meditate three times in April. - 0% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 0% complete.

Lose 4 pounds with short daily exercises and walking one mile a week. - 0% complete.

Adhere to my planner schedule. - 13% complete.

RELATIONSHIP - 0% Complete

Do one date night. - 0% complete.
Some notes: Aaron and I are thinking about camping on the 12th through the 13th.  We just have to get everything planned out.  Since I've never been camping before, I'm leaving that up to him.

SPIRITUAL - 0% Complete

Meditate three times in April. - 0% complete.
Volunteer for the local pet shelter once this month. - 0% complete.
Some notes: So this month is a little wonky when it comes to my volunteering.  One of my volunteer dates coincides with an after prom drawing event that's quite a ways away.  I technically could have made both, but it would have made me very tired well before the end of the gig and I don't want to do that to anyone.  Thus, I cancelled my second volunteer date.  To make up for it, I'm working on some fliers that I can enter into a contest and hopefully win ESFoA some much needed funding!

Final March Check-In

This... will be painful.

MARCH 2013 GOALS

Month is currently 100% over.
Overall: 95% complete.

CAREER - 116% Complete! Kickin' rear and takin' names!

Hit target number of monthly illustrations. - 130% complete.
Number illustrations completed - 130% complete.

Make target income for the month. - 158% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.
Complete February's illustration. - 75% complete.
Get MDartist.com functional again. - 100% complete.

The Good: Do I ever have anything bad to add about work?  I'm always ahead of the curb (can we say workaholic?).

The Struggles: I didn't struggle with free time as much as I did in February, but it was definitely an issue.  I can't seem to cut back on commissions though.  All I ever remember is how 2012 turned out, and a good 90% of our troubles were of the financial variety.  I feel like, if nothing else, should I stay on top of this we can avoid disaster.

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FINANCIAL - 100% Complete!  Not too shabby for March.

Make target income for the month. - 100% complete.

Complete taxes. - 100% complete.
Reconfigure budget. - 100% complete.
Keep budget. - 100% complete.

The Good: We did pretty well sticking to the budget this month.  Redoing it definitely helped.

The Struggles:  We did go a little over in terms of groceries.  That has to be scaled back this month.  A little more self-control, a little less "Well, I just don't have time." excuses.

--------

HEALTH - 67% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 100% complete.

Lose 3 pounds by doing a short daily exercise routine when I wake up. - (Negative) -33% complete.
Yearly doctor's appointment during the last week of March. - 100% complete.
Eye appointment in the middle of March. - 100% complete.

The Good: I got a lot of appointments out of the way, and my doctor reaffirmed why I chose that place despite the office mishaps.

The Struggles:  I've had my pity party. I'm done there.  We're not going to rehash it.

--------

HOME - 100% Complete

Organize the office closet. - 100% complete.

The Good: Boy does the closet look so much better.  I wouldn't be embarrassed of a stranger opening it now.

The Struggles:  Nothing really to struggle with.  I suppose I wish we could have downsized it a bit more, but in the end, it's all good.

--------

KNOWLEDGE - 100% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 100% complete.

Continue taking supplements. - 100% complete.

Continue daily mental exercises. - 100% complete.

Read one book. - 100% complete.
Complete January's book. - 100% complete.

The Good: Awesome book completed.

The Struggles:  Nothing bad to report.  Everything went well on this front this month!

--------

PERSONAL - 80% Complete

Continue taking thyroid meds. - 100% complete.

Meditate twice in March. - 100% complete.

Draw one illustration for myself. - 100% complete.

Lose 3 pounds by doing a short daily exercise routine when I wake up. - 0% complete.

Adhere to my planner schedule. - 100% complete.

No notes here, as most of these come from other sections.

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RELATIONSHIP - 100% Complete

Do one date night. - 100% complete.

The Good: Our wine and cheese night was a complete success, and something I'd very much like to do again should my diet allow it.

The Struggles:  Nothing bad here either!

--------

SPIRITUAL - 100% Complete

Meditate twice in March. - 100% complete.
Volunteer for the local pet shelter twice this month. - 100% complete.

The Good: I'm well on top of meditating this month, for the first time!  And volunteering has been a blast.  I'm so glad to finally be giving something back.  It creates some balance, you know?

The Struggles:  I need to meditate more.  I'm going to try to schedule three sessions next month, but if I don't hit it again, I'm going back to two.

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OVER ALL FOR MARCH: 95% Complete.

Biggest success so far? Again, I am a badass when it comes to my job.  It concerns me though that my biggest success for every month so far has been my job.  Not going to lie.

What I need to work on the most? Weight loss. Again, that pity party has sailed.  We're not going there again.

What I'm the most worried about? Weight loss.  Like I said above, not talking about it.

What am I the least worried about? Date night.  Aaron and I already have an idea for this month - camping so we can see the stars! I'm super excited.

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Check List for April

1. Finish February's personal illustration.
2. Sketch out thumbnails for my personal illustrations.
3. Sit down with Aaron tonight and review our savings so I can update the sidebar on overall progress.
4. Double up on April's home cleaning chore now that we may be moving sooner.
5. Sort out April's home cleaning chores into weekly goals.
6. Be 161 by the end of April.
7. Dentist appointment during April.
8. Select a new book to read.
9. Go camping.
10. Volunteer once next month.

Why I Haven't Checked In: My Non-Success.

There it is staring me right in the face.  My non-success.  Even though I'm trying to keep my chin up and stay positive, it's pretty hard right now.

Before I dive into my pity-party, which I desperately need, I want to go over some practical reasons why my weight is the way it is.

1. I've been on short-term steroids for about a week.
Here's some facts about steroids: They make you hungry as hell and increase your water retention.  Even more, steroids like the one I'm using have been known to cause and aggravate hypothyroidism.  I'm on the steroids to help with my overwhelming allergy and asthma problems, but I come off of them in three days.  Unfortunately, to make matters worse, the side effects can stick around for up to three weeks after your dose.  So, you know, there's that.

2. We had a friend in from out of town and ate out.  A lot.
Now I can't blame him.  He didn't initiate any of the fast food runs - to be fair, he even attempted to say no to one of them but I can't cook and didn't want to leave him hungry.  What it came down to is, for the better part, it was two against one and I'm the odd person out.  One round even led to some overnight food poisoning and that led me to skip a pill of my levothyroxine.  I'm not taking anything when I'm hovering over a toilet.  So there's also that.

So now that I've gotten that out of the way, I still want my damn pity party.

Last year, when I lost weight, I became trapped in the 160's.  Seeing 167 over and over on the scale when I had followed a diet and exercise routine for three weeks was devastating.  That's why I gave up. I feel like I am forever stuck. And, while I followed the diet routine every day like clockwork then, that certainly doesn't happen now.  I feel like I put a lot of effort into losing weight only to ruin it in a few days every time.

It doesn't help that I have people shoving fatty food in my face everywhere I go.  My mom brought over chocolate covered marshmallows on Saturday and my friend Mike brought over two chocolate bunnies on Easter.  I even had an extended argument with Mike about why we can't do weekly sushi anymore.  My metabolism isn't as fast as everyone else's.  I can't constantly eat these things and stay thin.  Hell, if I even glance in their general direction, my thighs swell.  I wish people would understand that they're sabotaging me and I don't have the self-control to say no.

And work.  Ugh, work.  You know what sucks about being self-employed?  Everything you make is dependent on how hard you work.  Last year, we failed because we didn't have sufficient funds for all the catastrophes.  I don't want that to happen again and that results in me routinely overbooking myself.  Overbooking myself leads to me running dangerously close to deadlines.  When deadlines get tight, I turn to McDonald's or pizza and push myself through.  And it works. I wish it didn't, but it does.  And that definitely happened this round.   I wish fatty foods didn't motivate me like they do.

To make matters worse, the exercise nights I used to have?  Gone.  The girls just got too busy and we never really exercise anymore.  There is one girl that attempts to make it out but she cancels often.  And that just leaves me in a defunct state.  "Well, no one's coming and I don't really have the time anyway, so I'll just skip it."  I need the accountability and I'm really lacking it right now.

I guess I'm just tired of being the only person in my life that cares about the weight I gained from my hypothyroidism.  I'm tired of being the only person trying to change everything.  I want to be positive.  That was the point of this blog - taking something so terrible as 2012 and creating something positive out of the ashes.  But it sucks when you're the only one with the motivation, the only one that cares and the only one struggling to change.

I just feel really alone right now.  And a bit like a failure.

And the worst part?  I have no one to blame but myself.  I need to learn some self-control.  The word no is dangerously lacking from my vocabulary.  I need to stop getting angry that my husband doesn't care about losing weight or that my friends are too busy.  Even if it's just me alone in my basement, I need to work out.  I need some god damn motivation to do this stuff on my own.

And there's my self-pity rant.  That is all.